Most people think an activist must be shrill, vociferous or at the very least radical. De-glam, by the way, is taken for granted – I mean, is the Pope Catholic? They are supposed to champion these mega causes, at least the size of a humongous dam – see, you’re already thinking Narmada! What one needs to realize is that these ‘humongous’ issues are really the easy ones – there for all to see, easy to write about and in most cases, have easy targets – the Government of India; which by the way, un-beknownst to most is simply you and I. Yes, it’s that basic – when simple ‘you’ and ‘I’ get together, we form the behemoth ‘Government of India’.
But the biggest point that almost all fail to see is that the real activists are the ones who fight for change – for an improvement in their day to day lives. This then is the real challenge. The issues are rarely ‘news-worthy’, and the target is most likely a non-descript humdrum ‘regular’ bloke. And as we all know – CHANGE ALWAYS MEETS WITH RESISTANCE.
For example, as a champion of women’s rights and women’s empowerment, why do most folks automatically assume that I support ‘bra-burning’ or ‘women’s boxing’? Why do people expect me to be shrill and go on ‘dharnas’ or at least join a procession now and then? First off, I don’t support boxing – male or female. I just don’t get it; and enjoying it is far too much for me. All that blood etc, is too gory for me. Fact is, I’ve often wondered what aliens must think of us should they watch a boxing match from their spaceship far way. Hundreds of people watching and PAYING to see two people hurt each other as best they can?? I can see them shaking their heads and calling us un-civilised and barbaric at the very least. Second, as a practical science student who also passed in Physics at the Intermediate (Plus two) level, I certainly wouldn’t advocate ‘bra-burning’, if for nothing other than long term gravity effects which could result in irreversible un-aesthetic results. Third, for some reason, God gave me a weak set of vocal cords, as I’ve discovered much to my chagrin, since I love to converse. I’m prone to laryngitis and occasional pharyngitis – being shrill, is just a no no. (plus I find it distasteful on a personal level). As for the ‘dharnas’, lets face it – what with the global warming and what not, the heat is simply not worth battling it out on the streets, for someone who’s not a Mayawati who can manage to get a.cs fitted to their podiums.
Where women’s lives are affected and where change is needed the most is exactly in these humdrum day to day affairs. All major laws, such as the Women’s Bills are meant to do just that penultimately. The idea of this historic Bill is that women should have a larger representation in the decision making processes of the country SO THAT her day to day life is made easier, when she spells out her problems and pushes for reforms in these very areas, by influencing the policies that affect them. But the base effect is targeted at just you and me. Thus, it is your humble day to day woman who stands up to the ‘auto-wala’, the woman who sees that eve-teasers who pass lewd comments at her don’t go un-punished, the woman who insists that the men vacate the seats reserved for women in public transports, the woman who insists on being treated as an equal in class, and the woman who peels her eyes out vigilantly, and never shows slack when she notices a discrimination being committed – these are the real activists my friend. And they largely go un-noticed because these are day to day humdrum affairs which are not news-worthy.
Why these daily on-goings are of extreme importance is that these are the exact situations that make a woman easily susceptible to exploitation – and here, I’m not necessarily talking of obvious exploitation as in molestation and the like, which by the way is in-human and un-acceptable to the core. These are the very situations that prevent her from competing with her peers in whatever field of life she may be in – as a student, a colleague, as a house-wife or even a shopper. For example, if a young attractive woman wants to meet a male teacher, who can help her in her academic performance, she can easily be wiped out of the competition by un-scrupulous competitors and others, who create an atmosphere of “sir REALLY likes her”, thus using Anthropological social control to abuse the situation in a way Machiavelli would have been proud of. And this then is how a seemingly humdrum and innocuous situation is manipulated by any wily opportunist with a mindset to do so. Even if the male teacher is an impartial no sex preference type, more often than not, he would avoid meeting the said student. Having said that, I have no doubts whatsoever, that the same ‘impartial’ teacher would not hesitate to meet her had she been a ‘male’ student. Besides, meeting students to help them in their studies is rarely a part of any teacher’s obligatory duties – more often than not, it falls in the ethics and values department which have very elastic and flexible rules and boundaries. Bottomline – academically zealous student loses out. The tragedy is that she can do nothing about it – UNLESS she is an activist and chooses to fight it out – not through dharnas or strikes, but through PERSISTENCE.
A series of such events across a spectrum of fields is what in totality makes women the lesser developed and the lesser sex. It’s time to stop blaming Haryana and Punjab as the ‘infanticide’ and ‘discrimination’ bowls of India, and look at the net effect of these seemingly innocuous situations that in their totality add up to make Indian women one of the most backward in the world. What society can do, if not help her, is to either encourage her in spirit or at the very least just leave her alone without ridiculing her – something that rarely happens. What the so called ‘liberal’ men can do is to be alert to these happenings and arrest the flow of such situations that easily escape the eye. After all true women’s liberation is not always about numbers – M.M.Rs and I.M.Rs. The capacity to make women, even attractive non- de-glam ones, compete on an equal footing with their male counterparts is what the stuff is all about.
And to those of you, who came to my column based on my ‘attractive’ header, don’t complain -there lies the explanation.
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